Little Paquets in Paris- part 2: castles!

What is it to do in France beside eating and visiting museums?! Touring castles, of course!

France is not all about Versailles, and here is a list of castles worthy of a visit, if you're ever visiting Paris surroundings with your family. 

Life as a researcher...

It's doable! Yes, children do get properly raised by working parents, and can have a normal childhood and adult life when brought up by parents who work and enjoy it! Even if I'm the first to admit that science is not truly compatible with a completely normal life *whatever that means!*.

I thought I'd just put it out there, since I'm surrounded by critics and whingers. 
Postdoc complain that they work too much (welcome in science! how delusional can you be that it comes as a surprise?). They seem to imply that they're pulling all the work while students sit on their drunk ass all day long and PIs enjoy their tenured track and celebrate by vacationing on lab's money.
Housewives and part-time working mum think we're monsters to not spend all our time with our kids.

I will not comment too much on one or the other, as I don't have the energy after spending the best of my day juggling between writing an animal ethics modification and planning the next family Holiday (and it's way too hot to argue, damn Australian summer!).

I will however, just state once for good a couple of things. This way, if this post reminds you of some conversation we've had in the past, next time we meet you can avoid the topic and talk to me about your next vacation plans or the new fattening recipe you want to share with me instead?

1- biologists don't have kids by accident. I would not have two beautiful one if I didn't love them. Especially on our salary ;-) That being said, you can have kids if you're in science. I know as many great moms and dads in science than in other fields. If you think that you need to sacrifice your life for science, either you think you're on your way to Nobel Price and cannot be interrupted even to deliver, or you're making fake excuses and need to talk to your partner. Perfectly ok to like kittens better than kids, just be open about it.

2- working mums use their free time to work. You know, your daily hour of yoga and your afternoon tea with other moms? that's when I work, not when kids take a bath or do homework, or build legos, or tell you about their day and their friends, or at dinner time, neither during Spanish lessons or birthday parties. I do rarely (never?) sacrifice time with the kids to do anything for myself.

3- people who "want it all" are the biggest jerks of all time. There is 24hrs in a day for just everyone (maybe not for The Flash?), you're not so special that you can make tons of money, love your job,  enjoy life, and have tons of kids and kittens and puppies, and sleep well at night. Except if you marry super well I guess. So much for your "perfect balance". Doesn't mean we cannot be happy being slightly-imbalanced Mr and Mrs Random without being judged from all sides?!

4- Science is a vocation *not a job*, at least in the highest research positions. Fancy to look for a cure to cancer part-time?

A word of caution: When you breathe science full-time, your kids might become a bit nerdy. Be it!

My parents work but they still take me to the aquarium! OMG!

Wow, seems like kids really hate going to work! The vortex is SO boring!

Yep, that's a neuron tatoo!

Tiare wants to be a marine biologist when she grows up

And it's FINE!

 

Les Paquets a Paris- Part 1

We're in Paris until tonight! Four full weeks of vacationing in France (minus some light work) and one week in Spain for a super high profile conference. It feels good to go back to places you grew up in.

I've been really enjoying taking the kids to the playground and the toy boat area in the Luxembourg, drinking too much wine and coffee, and going for shopping sessions at le Bon Marche.

I'm not used to miss Paris, but it can only be because in the past when away from it I was either in London or one hour away from New York. Even New Haven had little cafes, good bookstores, good theaters, and amazing museums. Now that we live in the country side Brisbane, I certainly appreciate more than ever being in the city... Pariiiis!!!!!

There are so many things to do and so many places to go to. Here is a little selection of what to do with kids or at least what we did, not necessarily in this order.  1- Galeries d'anatomie comparee et paleontologie

La galerie d'anatomie comparee

 2- Le jardin des plantes and especially the Alpin garden (it feels like you're in the Alps for real if you're lucky enough to be there on a sunny day)

3- Les Invalides: Napoleon tombs and the Army Museum. Girls and boys alike will love this museum (and parents too!). There, you can see all kind of armors including those of the child kings, when they would reach the throne at 8-10 years old and had to represent. Antoine now wants to be a Prince, and possibly a Musketeer as well.

It was a bit of a shocker/ reality check for me to realize how little our children know about French and European history. This is to be expected as they are growing up overseas. But Tiare also knows very little about modern history, including the WW1 and 2, which is a bit more concerning as these are everyone's business on the planet...
Let's stop relying on school programs and teach more stuff at home!
I guess we'll use it as an excuse to make more frequent trips back to civilization in the future!

4- Gardens, parks and playgrounds are everywhere, just as in most European capital cities. Le jardin du Luxembourg is my absolute favorite and a must to do if you bring kids in Paris. There are puppet shows on Wednesday and weekend days, there is one of the best playgrounds in Paris, and plenty of very French things. I'll develop that in a later post!

We've done quite a few things while here, but I'm meant to pack the family bags and kiss goodbye today, not write blog entries! In the next day- or in the plane, I'll do my best to update our trip report ;-) In English for touristic attractions and in French for family news! So long everyone!

Oh F*! I have lupus

When I got my diagnostic, it felt as if my boat capsized. I had been feeling down for over a year.

Before that, I was told that I was depressed, and it sure felt like it. No energy, loss of hair, dark thoughts, piling up pounds while I was never snacking, I was a subbing teacher for pilates classes at the local gym and I was biking to work. None of these made sense.

I woke up tired and went to bed exhausted. I was not happy, and I was physically hurting. Calves like stones, pounding headaches, serious memory loss…

I did not tolerate the Australian sun and would wear rashes on my face all year round, with only weeks of recess. Then I got thyroid problems and they thought it was the key. Months of painful and costly analyses later showed that there was nothing to be fixed there.

Anyway. When I finally got diagnosed, I realized that all this time when I thought I wanted to put a name on my tiredness and my fake-looking symptoms, I was lying to myself. I wanted to be cured, I didn’t need to know what I had: I just needed the doctors to put a name on my disease so that it would come with a list of pills. And a manual for an easy fix.

Well, ironically enough, I got tested for the disease while in the USA but it came back negative. I guess my doctor got a good hunch and I was already starting it. I also have published on Lupus in the past, with my former boss Patrick and a medic research team from Yale. 

So I knew from day one that there is no cure. I also knew that the disease ranges from a simple skin bother to a life-threatening condition. Which one would be mine? I have a truly beloved husband, whom I’ve shared half of my life with now, and my entire grown up life. I have two little kids who need a lot of energy, no a lazy-‘cause-hurting, always-on-the-couch-with-a headache-mom. 

So my life capsized just like one of these little 420. You see the signs and know that might happen, and all of a sudden you’re in the water! And like these funny little boats, if you react quickly enough, you can turn around pretty easily. Just push through, you get a bruise on your arm but you can breathe again. And in no time you’re back on your way. Although I have a rather severe form of Lupus, I am very fortunate to also have the kind that works with flares and remissions episodes. I’m mostly ok, and only sometimes really bad.

My doctors are great and found me drugs that not only help me with the symptoms but also don’t have any side effect. Another wonder presented to you by medical research! I have resume attending Yoga classes, and teach more pilates classes to keep my muscles strong and slow down nerve damage. I’ve learned to stay home and go back to bed when I need to. 

Nicolas is a champ and helps me to get through anything. Talking through what’s happening, being a great dad and posing as the family chauffeur since we arrived in Australia. I didn’t like driving a stick on the left before, but now that I’ve lost my deep-vision, I’m even a worse driver and a potential liability on the road. Nico deals with my students when I have headaches or worse and I’m stuck in bed. 

When I’m not sick, I feel fine. When I’m sick, I’m grateful to know remission will come. I’ve read about Lupus patients who have been in remission for 15 years and I’m hoping to become one of them.

Autoimmune diseases are really cruel ones. Attacking your own body is not cool, and no fun. Having two friends affected by multiple sclerosis, I think a lot about MS patients. While some go through much-welcome remission phases like I do with my Lupus, others only go worse gradually.  But with time, it always gets worse for both categories. They cannot turn their boat back up, or not that easily anyway. But researchers make serious progress on auto-immune disease these days. Fancy a donation? MS is a great research cause… Just saying.

L’annee 2013 et debut 2014 en bref, et en images. Et en Francais pour changer!

A la demande generale, un apercu en Francais pour la famille. Mais j’ai la flemme de trouver les accents sur mon clavier americain, donc il faudra lire un texte un peu desagreable!

2013 a ete a la fois tres dure et beaucoup plus facile que 2012. Plus dure pour la famille Francaise, et c’est difficile de se sentir si isoles et si loin de tout le monde. Impossible de rentrer pour une urgence, bloques par des papiers d’immigration qui nous interdisaient de voyager hors du pays. Des mauvaises nouvelles en pagaille, des problemes de santé pour tout le monde, la merde quoi… Et puis meme quand il y a des bonnes nouvelles, c’est nul de ne pas pouvoir etre la pour les partager.

Mais cote Australie et nouvelle vie, 2013 a ete nettement plus sympa avec nous que 2012.

Un nouveau boulot pour moi, Nico et moi dans un nouveau batiment de recherche flambant neuf, une nouvelle adresse perso dans un quartier sympa pour toute la famille.  Bon, on a re-demenage encore depuis et j’ai l’impression de vivre dans les cartons en permanence, mais on a enfin trouve un quartier qu’on aime, et garde nos voisins sympas dans notre carnet d’adresse ce qui est une amelioration assez dramatique de notre vie sociale depuis notre arrivee!!! 

Soiree cinema chez les voisins

Apres midi jeux au parc du coin avec tous les voisins

On s'installe enfin, et apres 2 ans ici je dis enfin aux gens que je viens de Brisbane quand on me le demande (ce qui prompt d'autres questions sur mon accent bizarre; mais enfin la maison pour le moment, c'est Brisbane).

Mes amis Americains et Parisiens me manquent. Ne pas elever nos enfants avec leurs cousins et grands cousins est un peu triste. J'ai toujours du mal avec l'absence de culture, la moyenne intellectuelle locale-tres basse, le prix des restos (je parle meme pas du rapport qualite-prix) et la mode du Queensland, mais avec le temps on s'habitue a tout...

En bref, les enfants grandissent super vite, Tiare a commence le violoncelle, la chorale, quitte la chorale, change de violoncelle,  commence a jouer au netball et Antoine a commence le foot et la gym. Ils ont un accent un peu tarte mais rigolo; pseudo-british-plouc sorti tout droit de "peppa pig" ou "Charlie and Lola". 

On a vu encore plus d’animaux australiens, on est retourne a nos endroits preferes et on a visite des nouvelles plages:

Moffat Beach, Noosa, Maroochydore, Tangalooma, Stradbroke Island.

On a conduit sur le sable (merci Aaron), rencontre des gens supers sympas, fait des pancakes et des cupcakes pour lever des fonds contre le cancer du sein, j’ai visite Melbourne en 2 jours. La vie sauvage locale  a Stradbroke Island est un peu dingue: on a vu des dauphins sauvages, des requins un peu bizarre qui nageaient dans les rochers a moins de 2 metres de nous, des raies mantas plus grandes que mon canapé et des tortues de mer qui avaient l’air furieuses qu’il y ait du courant dans les rochers.

On a suvecu a de nouvelles pluies tropicales, de l'eau qui tombe sur la ville comme si le ciel s'ouvrait d'un coup, et des nuages gris qui restent pendant des semaines jusqu'a ce que la riviere deborde.

On a appris que les dugongs sont plus proches de l’elephant que du dauphin et ne retiennent leur respiration que 3 minutes max, ce qui expliquent qu’ils broutent si proche de la surface. On a vu des lezards a langue bleue dans notre jardin et ailleurs; des tonnes de perroquets et d’oiseaux etonnants de toutes les couleurs, ainsi qu’un Lace monitor dans les arbres. Le genre de vie sauvage sur laquelle Nico et moi on s'exctasie avec precaution -comprendre a 3 metres minimum en disant "oh, ah" qu'est ce que c'est? Ca a l'air empoisonne" pendant que Tiare nous regarde avec un melange de pitie et d'amusement " c'est un Lace monitor et ca mange que des souris maman". Ah, ok.

On a teste le Vegemite (et sans surprise, c’est degueu, comme on pouvait s’y attendre), et fete Noel avec un arbre en plastique et sans neige (ni dinde) pour la deuxieme annee consecutive.

On a regarde des feux d’artifice tires du bord de l’eau, a Brisbane et a Stratrboke. L’annee 2013 a ete l’annee du spectacle pour enfant, et le premier casse-noisette familial. Brisbane est une ville provinciale et pretentieuse et qui se dit culturelle, mais en fait il n'y a rien a voir a part les spectacles pour enfant. Alors on y est alles!

On a commence a monter un plan d’attaque pour notre voyage a Uluru avec Kathy, et possiblemeent notre prochain Noel au Vietnam, ce qui seraient nos toutes premieres vacances-voyage exclusivement a quatre.

Et on a presque pris plus de vacances cet annee qu’en cinq ans aux Etats Unis. On s’apprete d’ailleurs a bloquer l'essentiel de nos vacances 2014 pour un retour trois semaines vacances a Paris (et Pau), une semaine de boulot en Espagne.

Avec un peu de chance on vous verra tous la bas, notez les dates: mi Mai-debut Juin!!!